What's causing your exhaustion?
After 20+ years coaching women to lose the behaviors, beliefs, and causes of their ‘less than empowered’ states, I’ve come to know a lot about exhaustion. The tidal wave of pure fatigue that most are experiencing now has been a long time in the making.
During this especially busy time of year, it’s helpful to establish routines that serve you better, so that exhaustion can be kept at bay. In previous posts, I’ve provided steps to prioritize your time better - from tackling the 3 most important tasks each day first (and only these till they are complete) to carving out time when finished for creativity and rest. (You can check my blog page HERE for additional suggestions.) In this week’s post, I want to go deeper. Let’s get to the root of exhaustion and overwhelm. It might not be what you think.
A key question to ask so that you can learn to manage stress and overwhelm is simply this:
What is driving you to push so hard?
- Are you trying to prove something? (Is it worth it?)
- Does being busy make you feel more important?
- Do you feel you have to be more/do more in order to meet others’ expectations?
- Are you trying to overcome insecurities established as a child?
- Is there pressure from other colleagues who have no boundaries or balance?
- Or are you overcompensating for someone else’s decision to not do their share?
By exploring your WHY, you can begin to recognize unhealthy self-talk and beliefs. This is the first step to changing habits that do not serve you well.
In sessions with my clients, we explore the unconscious patterns that keep them cycling through where their energy is leaking and not being spent effectively.
Burnout happens when your focus and energy is dedicated to disempowering activities which typically do not support your values, goals and long-term vision. Before diving head first into your next task, take a pause and ask yourself how you will feel if you spend your valuable time in this way. Be honest with yourself and have the courage to take different actions if what you’re setting off to accomplish is soothing someone else or your ego instead of your soul.
Do you feel shame or guilt around taking time to rest? Women in particular are programmed to be selfless, giving all we have to others. Much of our self-worth is often tied to how much we do for others, how much we sacrifice. This is particularly toxic. Catch yourself in these patterns and decide now to make a change.
Self care is no longer a luxury. Time spent to restore your energy, learning how to self-regulate and calm your emotions (versus repressing them) is especially wise. When we push to the point of exhaustion, no one wins. It's critical that our daily routines include loving kindness to ourselves. Period.
If you’re struggling with how best to take back your time, let’s talk. I offer complimentary sessions that provide an agreed upon, customized action plan to help you step confidently into a better way of doing (and being.) Schedule your free session HERE.
Taking care of you is always the right choice.
As the announcement always directs when flying: Apply the oxygen mask to yourself before helping others. When this becomes your practice, your life will more assuredly take flight.