Overly patient?
If you’re the type of person who finds themselves constantly at the listening end of someone else’s dreams or dramas, you might qualify as ‘overly patient’. Many with this personality pattern thoroughly enjoy being helpful but can find that they also often feel taken advantage of.
In this post, I want to support you with some valuable tips for becoming even more helpful while conserving your own resources. But first, let’s dig a little deeper to see if this type describes you.
You are likely an “overly patient” type if, at work, you
Find it difficult to provide negative feedback
Like to step back and think things through
Don’t like to speak until you know you have the right thing to say
Have a hard time saying “no’ because you don’t like to disappoint others
Struggle to make yourself a priority
Have the desk everyone comes to to talk things through
Are the one that will ensure nothing falls through the cracks when lots of change is taking place
Never forget a birthday and likely give very thoughtful, conscientious gifts
Don’t like change for change's sake. Need to know why change is happening.
This personality type is exceptional at consistent, repetitive work. They can be described as reliable, dependable, steady, easy-going, and tolerant. At the same time, to those with other personality types, you can also be seen as someone who procrastinates because your pace is usually not as quick as some other types might want you to be.
Is this ringing true for you? If so, here are four pieces of advice to improve your way of being while protecting your time and energy.
1. Learn to set clear time boundaries with others.
Because you are genuinely a great listener and care deeply about people, some won’t recognize how much of your time they consume. Learn to use this simple phrase as often as possible, “I want to talk to you. I have a hard stop in 15 minutes.”
2. Let, “Let me think about that” replace “I can help”
All you can do isn’t all you should do. Don’t overextend yourself to please others. Take a little time to ask yourself if the ‘ask’ is something you actually want to do or if you’re just responding out of obligation. If the latter, decide to decline. Doing anything out of obligation leads to resentment which is always a sign you’re ignoring your own, personal values.
3. Learn to say, “Your emergency is not my own.”
Your profile is all about taking the time it takes to make right decisions. There are circumstances when rushing produces mistakes. Know when to push back to slow things down as necessary.
4. Recognize that it’s Ok not to be Ok.
This personality type does a great job making themselves appear completely fine at all times while falling apart on the inside. (Think - a duck swimming gracefully on top of the water while paddling furiously underneath.) When overwhelmed, take a pause. Learn to carve out space and time for yourself to practice self-care. No one wins when your tank becomes depleted.
Discovering your profile type can be a real game-changer because it allows you to access your behavioral blindspots and get supportive tools to improve your work and life experiences. If you’d like to learn about your own predictable profile type, reach out HERE and mention you’d like a complimentary assessment. It takes less than five minutes to complete the quiz and the results are well worth the short time investment!
When we know better, we do better.