6 Step Process to Distill Despair
It’s been a rough week over here. My usual bubble of positivity ruptured rather abruptly earlier this week around something deeply personal. A wave of hopelessness rushed over me, the first of such despair I’ve felt in a very long while.
Hopelessness seems to be seeping into the crevices of relationships, work places, our families, our world. If we choose to focus there, we’ll be sure to get more of the same.
I refuse to have a doom and gloom outlook.
If I’ve learned anything over these past 20+ years of coaching and consulting, it’s this:
There is always a small place through which the light can return.
Sometimes, finding hope takes patience and a commitment to a practice of surrender.
I remembered today, in the wee hours of the morning when sleep was eluding me, to walk my talk. My hope is that this process will be valuable to you as well.
6 Steps process to distill despair
Give it to God.
There is nothing that God (Spirit) can’t transform into something not just healed but more amazing than originally desired. Ask for help and expect a triumphant response.
Let go of fear.
If you truly surrender that which is burdening you, fear vanishes.. But our ego minds, in their effort to control all things, will be on high alert. Notice the fear and decide to have faith in a positive outcome anyway.
A wonderful quote I read when digging for support said simply this: “Surrender, knowing that fear is nothing more than the nonacceptance of change, and change just is.” (Mic drop!)
Call in reinforcements.
This is when you ask for support from your sacred community. Ask them to pray for you (be as specific as possible about what you’re requesting.) Ask them to allow you privacy, if that’s what feels needed. Ask them to show up for you in whatever way feels true, right and holy for your given situation. (This can change depending on the circumstances.)
Forgive.
Forgive anyone who hurt you, remembering we all do the best we can with whatever circumstances and resources we have. No one intentionally hurts another (unless mentally unwell.) Forgive yourself too so that you can let go of the energetic chords that would otherwise keep you tethered to the pain and disruption of the story.
Accept change
Most of what we dread and fear really IS all about our need to keep things the same and this just isn’t realistic. Change is constant and change pushes us to evolve. When we let go of the holding-on-to-what-is-known, we can open to becoming more of what it’s time to be.
Give it time.
“Time heals all wounds,” has merit. The emotionality of a situation deflates when we stop picking at the story and/or feeding it more energy. The most valuable things in life take time to develop and become. They can take equally as long to heal and transform to what’s possible now..
For now, I’m let go of the need to rush the outcome.
I’m choosing to embrace a new chapter of what life has to offer, even if I can’t see what this new space has in store. Something tells me I’m on the brink of discovery — something rather liberating for all involved. It’s in God’s hands.
With this in mind, I’ll be back in a week or so and offer my complimentary Discovery Sessions again. For now, I’m taking a Holy Pause. Time to rest, reflect, and continue to work the process.
Be well. Love often and without regrets. Forgive. Heal. Grow. Repeat.